Edward (“Ned”) S. Seligman, January 7, 2021

Ned…Edward Stow Seligman…came from a prominent San Francisco family although he led a life that was far from taking advantage of that privilege.

The Seligman family had been prominent financiers and investment bankers on the East Coast before the Great Depression.  They are featured in Stephen Birmingham’s history “Our Crowd” about the most prominent Jewish families in the US in the 19th and early 20th Centuries.  Ned’s family tree included Guggenheims, the Stow family in California (Stow Lake in Golden Gate Park is named after one of them), Lewisohns of New York, and no doubt others of which I’m not familiar.  Bottom line: Ned came from a highly privileged background that opened up to him a very different life than the one he chose to live.

Ned left San Francisco in the 8th or 9th grade to attend Middlesex prep school in Concord, MA.  He came to Yale from Middlesex and was admitted our junior year into the HAL directed studies program.

Although I knew Ned, I didn’t room with him until senior year when he, Irwin Sentilles, Bill Hall and I shared a quad.  I was vaguely aware of his background but not because of anything Ned said or did.  Apart from hints here and there that he had been exposed to a sophisticated and privileged upbringing, Ned was just Ned.  He had a quick wit and infectious laugh.  He was upbeat and happy.

He and I found something in each other during senior year that bonded us as close friends for life.  Ned was a member of one of the above ground secret societies but I’ve forgotten which one – I think it might have been Book and Snake.  But, I may be mistaken about that.

The Peace Corps

Ned joined the Peace Corps after graduating from Yale.  I think his first assignment was in Upper Volta, now Burkina Faso.  I’m not clear on all of his jobs after graduation but I do know that most of those years were spent in Africa.  He had stints with the World Wildlife Federation and USAID.

Based on my happiness in Minnesota, he moved to St. Paul for a year and worked in the Minnesota Science Museum.  He was “trying out” living in the U.S.  But his heart really was in Africa and, in any event, the Minnesota winters were too long and cold for him.

At some point, he re-joined the Peace Corps and returned to Africa as the director of Peace Corps operations in various locations.  His last Peace Corps stop was in Sao Tome e Principe, a small island country on the Equator off the West Coast of Africa.  He was the director of the Peace Corps there for several years.

When the Peace Corps closed down in Sao Tome, Ned started an NGO – STeP UP – to carry on projects helping the people of Sao Tome.  The list of projects is long…you can visit STeP UP’s website at “http://www.stepup.st” to read about the organization.  STeP UP now is 20 or more years old.

Ned returned to the U.S. each year to get annual health check-ups, visit friends, and raise money for STeP UP.  When his parents were still alive, he would stop over in Minnesota for a week or so.

There but for the grace of God …

Many years ago, I received a call from Ned’s Mother telling me that he would not be visiting because he had become seriously ill.  Evidently, he had contracted a MRSA staph infection during a routine dental visit.  A few days after the dental appointment, he collapsed and went into a coma.

He later told me that the nurses in the ER referred to patients by their chances of dying…he was called “Mister 99,” as in there was a 99% chance he would not survive.

He remained hospitalized for months with a highly resistant staph infection.  The doctors ultimately had to amputate the ends of his fingers and his legs below his knees in order to eliminate the infection.  Antibiotics were unable to clear the infection from his extremities.

Ned spent several months in rehab facilities to regain his strength and learn how to function with his new reality.  My wife and I visited him during his rehab, and he was the same old Ned…jovial, light-hearted, and no complaints.

When he was sufficiently recovered, he headed back to Sao Tome to continue his work with STeP UP.

After his parents died, Ned bought a condo in Washington, D.C. and used that as his home base when he returned to the U.S.  I made an annual trip each Spring to visit him.

In the many years since his illness, I’ve never heard Ned utter a single word of complaint.  I’ve never heard him go down the “woe is me” path.  To the contrary, Ned didn’t let his considerable handicap stop him.  He tooled around D.C. in his motorized wheel chair as if he had no obstacles.  He would hop onto the D.C. Metro and meet my wife and me at a restaurant or a museum anywhere in the city.

More remarkably, he would make the annual trip from Sao Tome to D.C. by himself.  The trip took nearly 24 hours: a 7 hour flight from Sao Tome to Lisbon; waiting in the Lisbon airport for a flight often to Newark or Philadelphia, not D.C.; then a flight to D.C., and finally a cab ride to his condo.  I marveled at how he made that trip, especially as he got into his late 60’s and early 70’s.

Ned is easily the most selfless person I’ve ever known.  His upbringing gave him opportunities to lead a privileged and material life but he chose to lead a life that served others.  He never surrounded himself with the trappings of wealth.

Intellectually, he was sharp and thoughtful.  He had a wonderful sense of humor and an infectious, quick laugh.  And, while he might have complained about the state of our political affairs or dealing with some bureaucratic hassle while trying to make his travel arrangements, he never complained about being in a wheel chair or about his handicap.  He took life as it came to him and moved forward.

Ned and I have exchanged emails several times a week for years, sometimes carping about politics, sometimes exchanging humor, and always just staying in touch.  He was a member of my family, a friend of my wife and sons.  That exchange will go silent now and I will miss him deeply.  I will miss Ned for the rest of my life.  But, I have photos and memories that will make me smile.

I guess the mark of how we live our lives is how we are remembered and how we’ve affected others.  Ned may not be here now but he isn’t gone.

Fred Morris

PS Here are some other tributes we received about Ned:

From an anonymous JE classmate:

When I think of him, I think of his unbounded exuberance and his unstinted reactions to people and events in his world.  There was very little that was held back.  At the same time, there always was part of him that was very sage, very wise, very knowledgeable about the old ways–that came from his upbringing which was a very potent blend of SF Nob Hill and NYC Our Crowd.  It seemed to me that he came to Yale fully formed and left the same way.  On arrival, he had a suite of dear friends from Middlesex and acquaintances in the faculty.  He knew the value of friendship and was open to having many, many friends.  It may not have been obvious back in those days that he would leave this world with literally hundreds if not thousands of people whom he had benefited directly.  Nonetheless, he did that, whether he intended to or not.  Ned was always fun be with, sober or otherwise.  He left an indelible mark on so many of his classmates, who will miss him.

From Karla Forsyth McGray

I received word of Ned’s death a few days ago from Fred Morris, Ned’s life long friend. I was shocked and heartbroken. Ned had persevered through so much and then to lose his life due to an accident like this. We have continued to correspond over the years and, like others, I have appreciated his visits when possible.

I worked with Ned at the Science Museum of Minnesota in the late 70s and early 80s. He quickly endeared himself to us with his wry wit, his keen intelligence, good “read” of people, love of a practical joke and great laugh. He enjoyed his time with us, and there were so many good times, but his fond memories were of his time in the Peace Corps and his heart was in Africa. He was a happy man when he could return.

He found his “calling” in São Tomé with Step Up. Here he poured his heart and soul into his work and used his life so well. As a chaplain, I used to tell him I would send prayers. He laughed about wondering if they would work on him. I told him prayers are simply thoughts and they work on everybody. He said he could “buy that” and was grateful for all support! We laughed. I loved him and I’m so sad he is no longer in this world. I will miss him. He was an extraordinary man and a good friend.

From David Reyes

I met Ned in Ouagadougou in 1974, when he was one of the (in)famous “Peace Corps 1969” alumni who was still working there (He was with Catholic Relief Services). I would ride my mobylette about 30 K out to his compound on Sundays for roast beef, Bach, and great company … We managed to connect in New York a few times in the mid-70s, including a memorable post-Thanksgiving dinner with his oh-so-impressive Auntie Marjorie Lewisohn … I married someone else from my Ouaga days and we went to Kathmandu for 4 years, then ended up living right across the street from Ned — so much back and forth, it was wonderful — in Mogadishu in 1983-84 … He was with the Quakers then. We all ended up back in DC in the mid-to-late 80s, where he first house sat at his uncle’s posh home near where Obama now lives, and later bought his own place in our Mt. Pleasant neighborhood – so many good times were had both at our homes and up the street at an African bar. We moved to Zaire (now Congo) when we lived there in 1989-o0- – and I remember Ned out there too, not sure if he was on my husband’s project or doing something else ? But always a delight. Once he moved to Sao Tome e Principe it was harder to see him, STeP not being on any main airline routes … but we would manage a lunch or dinner or at least phone call when he was in DC during those years, before and after his MRSA. This photo is from when he visited Asheville in June 2019 for a 50th Peace Corps reunion,. Oh, the times we had together and the stories we could share!! I will miss him dearly. RIP my friend.

From Christopher Childs
Author, The Spirit’s Terrain: Creativity, Activism, and Transformation (Beacon Press; Foreword by the Dalai Lama)

I knew Ned from our days at Middlesex School more than half a century back (my most enduring image of him from that time is from fall days on the soccer pitch), and years later we met again through a mutual Middlesex connection. There was another gap — decades, this time — and somehow (I’m not sure how) he found me here in Minnesota and paid a visit to our home in Saint Paul when on one of his occasional trips here from Sao Tome. As a veteran of various nonprofit entities I found his work with StepUp wonderful, and the dedication and courage he showed in persevering after the assault from MRSA was both deeply moving and greatly inspiring. Among my fairly wide acquaintance in the world of NGOs, he was one of the most remarkable people I have known. Ave atque vale.

From Melissa Ringheim Stoddard

How sad I am to read this news. Ned and I were colleagues at the Science Museum of Minnesota
and continued our friendship when he left the museum to work in Washington and ultimately, Sao Tome.

For several years he continued to “stop by” Minnesota on his trips back to the US, which speaks to the many enduring friendships he made here. The last time I saw him was after the tragic amputation of his feet

when we managed, not without difficulty, to get out on our boat. He was so game to do it, that he made us overcome our own concerns. Such a brave, gentle man! I loved his big, contagious laugh. And he found so many things laughable!

And, despite the many other kinds of opportunities he could have pursued, he chose his work in Sao Tome. He spoke frequently, when he worked at the Science Museum, of how much he missed West Africa. I’m so glad he had the guts and tenacity to do the work he was called to do. I will really, really miss him.

What a guy.

Eric McClafferty writes on behalf of the Step-Up Board

Dear friends and Step Up supporters,

It is with a heavy heart that we must report some very sad news about Ned Seligman.

Ned had an accidental fall at his home in Sao Tome and then passed away a few days later from kidney failure at the hospital on the morning of January 7. Ned will be buried this coming Tuesday, January 12th, in Sao Tome, a place he loved very much. In lieu of flowers, we are planning an online fundraising campaign to raise money to help keep Step Up going, which was Ned’s sincere wish.

Since many of us are not able to attend the funeral, we thought it would be good to organize a virtual celebration of Ned’s life via zoom or a similar platform. We are working on organizing that event, which we hope will take place in the next month – six weeks.

More details on the virtual celebration of life and the fundraising campaign will be forthcoming soon. In the meantime, we ask that you think of a happy time you spent with Ned (and there were many), and send him positive thoughts and prayers.

In loving memory of Ned Seligman.

Sincerely,
The Step Up Board and Ned’s family

Photos of Ned At Step Up Prior To Amputations