Thomas Buccello (Fitzsimmons) – 50th Reunion Essay

Thomas Buccello (Fitzsimmons)

fitzsimmons.tom@gmail.com

Spouse(s): Timothy Donoghue

Education: Yale College, BA ‘69, Yale School of Drama, MFA ‘71

Career: Actor

College: Pierson

My life since Yale—how do I even begin to take stock of such a stretch of time? Fifty years of ups and downs, successes and disappointments, friends and relatives living and dying. Of course I am not the same as I was when I graduated. Of course I have changed, matured, hardened in some ways, relaxed in others. But when I stop to think about the passage of all this time—which I seldom, if ever, do—what may strike me most is how happy I am. My life, touch wood, has sailed along pretty smoothly. Thirty or forty years of being an actor, of meeting wonderful, smart, funny, caring, enormously talented people. Thirty-six years, as of this moment, of being with my husband, Tim, who has, despite my proclivities to negativity, kept my happiness bubbling along, bless his heart. Almost thirty years of living part-time or full-time in France, far away from the joys and the madness of the US. I have been blessed, and continue be so.

But what did Yale have to do with all this? It is difficult to say, but I think that my years at Yale gave me the space to feel out who I was, and therefore to become who I now am. Yale was a safe space, even though rife with the attendant traumas of late adolescence/early adulthood. It also, I surmise, taught me how to think: how to negotiate a path between what might seem to be contradictory ideas, how to reconcile differences, how to differentiate between what is important and what is less so. Yale gave me a certain strength, a way of seeing. I felt grounded there, and with that, more confident.

I realize that nothing in life is ever truly secure, and that this tiny, golden world of mine could come crashing down at any moment; but until it does, if ever, I owe an enormous debt of gratitude to Yale, to its teachers, and to my friends and fellow students. But when I thank Yale for helping me into my life, I must also thank my incredible, kind, and patient roommates: Gene, J.J., and Pat. Gems, each one.